Say Hello, Wave Goodbye

One of the hands-down hardest things about the Foreign Service is the goodbyes. Yeah, you've got those in the military too, but they're not nearly as constant and they never felt as permanent. Chances were good you'd end up in the same town as your military friends at some point, and at worst you were a time zone or two away from them. In the Foreign Service, it's a whole different ball game.

I've bitched about mentioned the small size of the expat community in Yekaterinburg before, but, well, I'm gonna do it again. When we got here, there was an expat playgroup with about seven families in it. One by one, those families have disappeared, leaving us with only one other family (and they're ready to leave at any time). In August, I said goodbye to three of my four expat mom friends: my German friend, Claudia, my Swedish friend, Christina, and my British friend, Chinwe. These ladies (especially Chinwe, who I got lunch with almost weekly) were my sounding boards, my advisors, my sympathetic ears, and most importantly, my friends. They were living in the same place with kids of approximately the same age, and they were as out of place here as I am.

We didn't hang out that much in the grand scheme of things, not the way I hung out with my girlfriends back home. We all travel a lot and Christina worked full-time, Chinwe part-time, and of course I have a job. But just knowing they were here was a comfort. If we were at an embassy (or a larger consulate), we'd also have a constant flow of people leaving, but there would be new families to replace them. In Yekaterinburg, none of  the companies that hire expats or the diplomatic missions seem to be able to attract families with kids. Maybe some will come in the next year, but I'm not hopeful (not a single new family has arrived since we've been here).

I get it. This is what we signed on for when we decided to try out this lifestyle. And nothing is permanent - I'm sure I'll run into my friends some day (although I really wish my foreign friends would get on Facebook!). All I'm saying is, goodbyes are hard, and I've had more than my share in the past few weeks.

I'm far more partial to hello.